postheadericon Ready or Not, Here I Come!

As I'm staring down the start of 2015, I am struggling. It's so much easier to focus on all the ways I fell short in 2014, rather than celebrate my victories. Maybe it's because I'm disappointed with how the year ended, even though I was thrilled with how it began... Really, I was happy with the first 8 months. But the recent set-backs and failures are most recent in my mind. So is that why it's all I can think about?

I have two days left of this year and then it's time to move forward whether I want to or not. Just like last year, I've set pretty lofty goals. I've set these goals in pretty much all aspects of my life. I've done the planning, the prepping, the organizing... But will it work? If I'm being honest, I'm petrified that it won't. I'm scared that I won't be able to accomplish the things that�I so desperately want to do. How much of it is in my control anyway?

I was given a tile for Christmas with this quote:

"Surrender to what is.
Let go of what was.
Have faith in what will be."

I suppose it's okay that I'm scared, but I refuse to let that fear paralyze me. The way 2014 ended is done with and over. I can't do a darn thing about it anymore. But I can surrender it and leave it at the feet of Jesus so that I can push through. I can choose to let go of what was so that I can keep my eyes and my face in the sunshine of what is to come. I can stand firm in the faith that God is with me and will be with me in all that is to come.

I've had a lot of negative thoughts lately because I feel I really let myself down, but God spoke to me through a song once again today. Laura Story's song, "Blessings" always touches me. The lyrics are incredibly moving and listening to it today in the car was no different. The chorus says:

'Cause What if Your blessings come through rain drops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

Through all of the ways I feel I failed, God is using me. God is redeeming my failures. Maybe my struggles are what I need to fully rely on God to be my strength.

So here's to 2015! Here's to making it a year where I learn to know the strength and power of God in my life and lay down my own pride. Here's to letting go of fear and allowing God's peace to fill me. Here's to finding joy and blessings amidst my failures and disappointments. Here's to seeing what God can do in my heart...and in my life.

What if my greatest disappointments or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can't satisfy
What if the trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are Your mercies in disguise


0 # Margaret 2014-12-30 13:44
Janet, we have all been there too. You've accomplished so much this year and setbacks will happen (I know from experience !). It's how we respond to setbacks that matters. Blessings by Laura Story is very meaningful in my life as well and so very true. Our greatest disappointments can lead to some amazing things... Love you and I am so proud of you!
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0 # Janet 2014-12-31 10:38
I love you, too! Thanks for those encouraging words :) You're the best!
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